VICTORIA – New Democrats received a leaked document from the North Pole Wednesday, arriving in a brown envelope covered with images of snowflakes and smelling like gingerbread.
The leaked document was Santa’s naughty and nice list for the B.C. Liberals:
The Naughty List:
The entire B.C. Liberal Party
For only caring about themselves and their wealthy donors, and not working for the people of British Columbia.
As a minister, for fooling Santa into thinking the ICBC deficit was 9000 per cent smaller than it actually is.
For his lack of support for a woman’s right to choose.
For ludicrously fear mongering on proportional representation for British Columbia, by invoking Hitler.
For calling out Todd Stone in public for his ICBC deception and failure, when Wilkinson himself was also in cabinet, fully briefed on the true size of the deficit (according to Stone). Along with the rest of the BC Liberals, Wilkinson kept the financial crisis secret from Santa and all British Columbians before the election.
For deliberately leaving the Speaker of the House off his Christmas card list. Not nice.
Mike de Jong
For mocking Chinese accents in the B.C. legislature, after previously mocking the last name “Mao” (also in the legislature). Also for denying the housing crisis exists while the housing crisis skyrocketed. Lastly, for trying to rush Uber in at all costs while part of cabinet, then as a leadership candidate, pretending to suddenly care about the impact on the taxi industry.
Mike de Jong AND Rich Coleman
As ministers, for seemingly being okay with alleged money laundering in B.C. casinos by shutting down the task force instead of pursuing the serious allegations aggressively.
For coming to the defence of a school trustee who is making repeated, hateful comments against people based on sexuality and gender identification. Also for suggesting a B.C. mountain should be carved into a pair of hands instead of a reindeer, a candy cane or Santa himself.
The Nice List:
For breaking from the B.C. Liberal pack and avoiding confrontation in Question Period, saying “I’m not adversarial. I’m not like that. Inside my head I’m saying lots of stuff, but I’m never comfortable saying it out loud.”
For admitting, “It’s my belief that our party rushed too quickly to welcome Uber to British Columbia.”
For being honest about why the B.C. Liberals oppose proportional representation (hint: it’s about them, not the people of B.C.) – “Because you know what? If we do not defeat this referendum, there will be no majority. There will forever be a minority of B.C. Liberals.”
The entire B.C. Liberal caucus – Including de Jong, Stone, Wilkinson, Lee, and Sullivan
For eventually adopting the BC NDP’s election platform, reading it out loud as the B.C. Liberal government’s final throne speech, then voting for it in the legislature. Thank you for your ongoing support!